Which Developmental Stage Are You At In Your Relationship?

The Relationship Maze

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In this episode of "The Relationship Maze," Tom and Angela dive into the different developmental stages of relationships, exploring the model developed by Ellyn Bader and Peter Pearson from the Couples Institute.
Drawing parallels with early childhood development, they discuss the stages of adult relationships: symbiosis, differentiation, practicing, rapprochement, and mutual interdependence. Each of these stages serves a specific function in the development of the relationship and each of these stages requires particular developmental tasks of each individual as well as the couple as a team.
Tom and Angela unpack the challenges and dynamics couples face at each stage, from the initial euphoria of the honeymoon phase to the struggles of couples who don't move beyond this initial stage. These often present in couples therapy and face the challenges of enmeshment or hostile dependency. Tom and Angela also touch on the complexities of partners being at different stages in relationships and provide insights into navigating these relationship stages towards a healthier and fulfilling connection.
If you're looking to understand and improve your relationships, join Tom and Angela as they guide you through this enlightening exploration.
00:00 Couples Institute's relationship model based on developmental stages.
05:52 Stages of couple relationships: symbiosis and differentiation.
06:59 Seeing people in a different light is natural.
11:49 Practicing stage focuses on individual autonomy and self-esteem.
15:26 Stage of relationship development towards mutual interdependence.
18:16 Mutual interdependence creates a secure, mature relationship.
19:59 Rare to have partners at different stages.
25:12 Couple therapy: partners' different developmental phases challenge.
26:57 Visit relationshipmaze.com for improving your relationships.
Contact us for information about individual counselling/psychotherapy, couples therapy, clinical supervision or CPD training.
Tom's website
Angela's website
Struggling with a lot of conflict and arguments in your relationship? Learn about communicating effectively and addressing common relationship problems in our Stop Arguing, Start Loving mini course.
Learn everything you always wanted to know about building and maintaining loving relationships in our comprehensive course The Relationship Maze, starting with understanding yourself in relationships to understanding your partner and understanding what makes for a succ

Contact us for information about individual counselling/psychotherapy, couples therapy, clinical supervision or CPD training.
Tom's website
Angela's website
Struggling with a lot of conflict and arguments in your relationship? Learn about communicating effectively and addressing common relationship problems in our Stop Arguing, Start Loving mini course.
Learn everything you always wanted to know about building and maintaining loving relationships in our comprehensive course The Relationship Maze, starting with understanding yourself in relationships to understanding your partner and understanding what makes for a successful relationship. We look at common causes of relationship problems and offer solutions. Learn how to address relationship problems and questions without breaking up.