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Those with Sex, Porn, Love Addiction patterns of behaviour do not love or like themselves
Manage episode 431897240 series 3590223
Interview by Damian Andrews of SHAIR.care: What it means to be a man (7)
“Mirror, Mirror on the wall, who is the fairest or them all”?
How do you answer that question for you? Learn to love self, before you can love others.
I use that thing called EMDR to work on the distorted image of self. (I am an Accredited EMDR Practitioner in the UK). What is this thing called EMDR? It is Eye Movement Desensitisation Reprocessing. What a mouth full!
I can talk about it til the cows come home, but you will still have frowns on your forehead. Watch a few of the video clips:
https://youtu.be/9uE04Blfd-Q?si=MrNZZmCAgmTmOUo7 EMDR (Prince Harry) experience
https://youtu.be/xZVw-9ThmSM
Stop accepting the crumbs off the table. The brain’s dialogue with you can go like this:
“It’s better to have someone, than no one; but people are not safe. Keep them at arms-length and be ready to retreat quickly, if you get a whiff or hint that they are unhappy and may finish with you. It is best to torpedo the relationship; jettison it and protect your heart from further pain, before they do it to you. So, throw in a hand grenade (effectively, to create conflict so as to force the other person to have to leave and finish with you); and then the ‘fait accompli’ kicks in, where – ‘I knew they would finish with me at some point’. (When in fact that was not necessarily what they were planning), but more important that you do it to them, before they do it to you, because it hurts less, done that way and you are then in more control of the pain, than if it is done to you and you were caught off guard (again). Make sense?
“Do onto others, before they do it to you” – is being played out repeatedly. It all makes logical sense to your brain, even if it doesn’t to you!
Get the help you need: bit.ly/pornaddictionhelp
The Kairos Centre created one of the world's first comprehensive Online Webinar Sex, Porn, Love Addiction video-on-demand Recovery Programme; discover the real, authentic you. www.kairos-centre.com or email info@kairos-centre.com
Now launched: A Video-on-Demand Online Course (for Singles, Couples/Marrieds/Partners) Access here - https://www.kairos-centre.com/changement-on-demand/
Gary McFarlane (BA, LLM, Dip, Certs)
Support Our Show
Linktree - https://linktr.ee/garymcfarlane
Episode Keywords: Sex Addiction | Porn Addiction | Love Addiction | Root Causes | Brain Impact | Self-Soothing Behaviors | Family Conflict | Emotional Neglect | Peer Pressure | Performance Pressure | Separation | Divorce | Fear | Anxiety | Stress | Pain | Dissociation| Recovery Program | EMDR Therapy | Emotional Event | Trauma Healing | Neuroplasticity | Online Therapy | Sex Addiction Recovery Program | Compulsive Behaviors | Intimacy Issues | Sexual Dysfunction | Obsessive Thoughts | Guilt | Infidelity | Traumatic Bonding | Objectification | Hypersexualization | Pornography Industry | Love Addiction Patterns | Attachment Styles | Sexual Compulsivity | Behavioral Therapy | Relapse P
102 episodios
Manage episode 431897240 series 3590223
Interview by Damian Andrews of SHAIR.care: What it means to be a man (7)
“Mirror, Mirror on the wall, who is the fairest or them all”?
How do you answer that question for you? Learn to love self, before you can love others.
I use that thing called EMDR to work on the distorted image of self. (I am an Accredited EMDR Practitioner in the UK). What is this thing called EMDR? It is Eye Movement Desensitisation Reprocessing. What a mouth full!
I can talk about it til the cows come home, but you will still have frowns on your forehead. Watch a few of the video clips:
https://youtu.be/9uE04Blfd-Q?si=MrNZZmCAgmTmOUo7 EMDR (Prince Harry) experience
https://youtu.be/xZVw-9ThmSM
Stop accepting the crumbs off the table. The brain’s dialogue with you can go like this:
“It’s better to have someone, than no one; but people are not safe. Keep them at arms-length and be ready to retreat quickly, if you get a whiff or hint that they are unhappy and may finish with you. It is best to torpedo the relationship; jettison it and protect your heart from further pain, before they do it to you. So, throw in a hand grenade (effectively, to create conflict so as to force the other person to have to leave and finish with you); and then the ‘fait accompli’ kicks in, where – ‘I knew they would finish with me at some point’. (When in fact that was not necessarily what they were planning), but more important that you do it to them, before they do it to you, because it hurts less, done that way and you are then in more control of the pain, than if it is done to you and you were caught off guard (again). Make sense?
“Do onto others, before they do it to you” – is being played out repeatedly. It all makes logical sense to your brain, even if it doesn’t to you!
Get the help you need: bit.ly/pornaddictionhelp
The Kairos Centre created one of the world's first comprehensive Online Webinar Sex, Porn, Love Addiction video-on-demand Recovery Programme; discover the real, authentic you. www.kairos-centre.com or email info@kairos-centre.com
Now launched: A Video-on-Demand Online Course (for Singles, Couples/Marrieds/Partners) Access here - https://www.kairos-centre.com/changement-on-demand/
Gary McFarlane (BA, LLM, Dip, Certs)
Support Our Show
Linktree - https://linktr.ee/garymcfarlane
Episode Keywords: Sex Addiction | Porn Addiction | Love Addiction | Root Causes | Brain Impact | Self-Soothing Behaviors | Family Conflict | Emotional Neglect | Peer Pressure | Performance Pressure | Separation | Divorce | Fear | Anxiety | Stress | Pain | Dissociation| Recovery Program | EMDR Therapy | Emotional Event | Trauma Healing | Neuroplasticity | Online Therapy | Sex Addiction Recovery Program | Compulsive Behaviors | Intimacy Issues | Sexual Dysfunction | Obsessive Thoughts | Guilt | Infidelity | Traumatic Bonding | Objectification | Hypersexualization | Pornography Industry | Love Addiction Patterns | Attachment Styles | Sexual Compulsivity | Behavioral Therapy | Relapse P
102 episodios
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