Relationship Skills Part 1: Attune to Yourself First

Sex Help for Smart People

Episode 8 is the first in a series about Relationship Skills. We're starting with the fundamental skill of self-attunement. This is the simple practice of tuning into our emotional activation level to understand where we're at and what we're available for.
It's simple, and doesn't take long. It is also a game-changer for your relationships, whether with yourself or with everyone else in your life.
What is self-attunement?

Most of us struggle to maintain a deep connection during daily life and when we interact with others. Self-attunement is about being "home" to ourselves, staying connected to our needs and sensations rather than being solely outward-focused.

I'll walk you through a simple exercise to drop into your body, assess your emotional activation on a 0 to 10 scale, and be present to your own experience. This exercise can be done anytime, anywhere, and serves as a foundation for deeper self-awareness and authenticity.

Benefits of Self-Attunement:

• Self-attunement enhances authenticity and empowers us to make decisions aligned with our true desires.
• It improves our ability to connect with others by fostering genuine presence and understanding.
• Self-attunement also aids in setting boundaries and navigating challenging conversations with clarity and composure.

Practical Applications:

• Self-attune before engaging with others, especially in intimate or emotionally charged situations.
• Use self-attunement to regulate your capacity for decision-making and avoid acting impulsively under emotional stress.
• Employ self-attunement to empathize with others and defuse tense situations.
• Share the practice of self-attunement with friends or partners to foster mutual understanding and support.

Conclusion:

• Self-attunement is a powerful tool for cultivating self-awareness, authenticity, and meaningful connections in all aspects of life. It also helps us not be jerks to ourselves or other people.
• By integrating this simple practice, you can boost your emotional intelligence, as well as the fulfillment you feel in your connections with yourself and others.

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