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Authentic Wellness Check-In: Boundaries
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A big part of Authentic Wellness is setting good boundaries. A few months ago, I presented a workshop on boundaries to a small group of people and it went well so I decided that I would touch on it during what I have dubbed our biweekly check-ins. This is the time between interviews for us to have a little conversation and share what’s going on in our lives.
Women are natural nurturers and sometimes we can get caught up in the need to please. While that works out for the person that is getting what they want, it’s not so beneficial for the person who is putting themselves on the back burner. Women are often confused about setting appropriate boundaries on their time, energy, and efforts.
When setting boundaries, women wonder:
- Am I being selfish?
- Why is this so difficult?
- Will I still have friends when I do this?
- Are boundaries set in stone?
- Where do I start?
It is impossible to address boundaries in detail right now, but let’s put down a foundation. Boundaries aren’t selfish. They are self-sustaining and put you in a place that will allow you to be at your best. Realizing where your boundaries lie is one of the best things you can do for yourself and others.
Boundaries are difficult to set in place because you don’t want to tell people “no”. You don’t want to disappoint them or not be there for them. Telling others “no” isn’t easy at first. But you will get used to it. Once you find your groove and realize the peace you get from clear and meaningful boundaries, you will wonder what you were doing before.
There is no guarantee that everyone will be happy with your newfound boundaries. In fact, most people will push back when you start to separate things that are your responsibility and return the tasks to them that they should be responsible for. The best example of the need for boundaries is the show on Discovery+ I Love a Momma’s Boy. Check it out and let me know what you think.
The more respect you have for yourself, the more respect people will have for you. Your friends and family will learn to deal with what feels right for you right now. Boundaries aren’t walls. They aren’t set in stone. If you get to a place where you feel more comfortable with the person you imposed boundaries with, you can relax them. You are in complete control.
Ultimately, that is what you want. You want to feel like you are in control of your life and your decisions. Click HERE to watch the original Boundaries for Beginners video.
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