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Psychotherapist and Coach, Torie Wiksell, is no stranger to talking about challenging and dysfunctional family dynamics. In addition to specializing in working with the adult children of parents with borderline and narcissistic personality disorders as both a therapist and coach, Torie grew up with a mother who had unmanaged borderline personality disorder (BPD) and quite a few narcissistic traits. Torie has spent a significant portion of her 11+ year career as a therapist working with clien ...
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I'm a wife, mother, grandmother AND have lived with BPD for my entire life. I've been ashamed of this & kept it as hidden as possible. I've just come out of the Mental Health closet & am taking responsibility for my recovery & accountability for my past behaviours. I want it fixed. I'm not talking about coping skills, I'm talking about digging down to the root cause and adjusting the distorted core belief that "MY FEELINGS ARE IRRELEVANT & SHAMEFUL, DEVOID OF WORTH & THEREFORE SO AM I MYSELF ...
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If you’re the adult child of a parent with borderline or narcissistic personality disorder, the holidays can feel more stressful than joyful. In this episode, I’m sharing practical, actionable strategies to help you navigate these tricky family dynamics while prioritizing your mental health. From setting boundaries to managing emotional triggers, w…
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Can personal experiences spark global change? In this episode, I share the story behind my newest venture, Confident Boundaries, and how my passion for helping adults with parents who have borderline and narcissistic personality disorders has evolved throughout this past year. Confident Boundaries goes beyond my therapy and coaching practices, offe…
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Growing up with a narcissistic mother can feel like navigating a maze of manipulation and emotional chaos. Ever wonder how the image of a "perfect mom" can clash so deeply with reality? In this episode, I share snippets from my own personal journey of growing up with the "perfect" narcissistic mother. We'll dive into how societal perceptions of mot…
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In this episode of You’re Not Crazy, I’m diving into the challenges of navigating family dynamics during the holiday season—especially when you’re dealing with parents who have narcissistic or borderline personality traits. I’ll share actionable strategies for conserving your emotional energy and prioritizing your peace and happiness. Together, we’…
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Today I'm going to try to convince you that embracing stress is the secret to your long term peace and happiness. Discover how the cycle of avoidance, driven by the fear of upsetting a parent with borderline or narcissistic personality disorder, might be keeping you stuck in a loop of burnout and resentment. By shifting your mindset and recognizing…
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In today's episode, I discuss whether you should set boundaries or go no contact with a parent who has unmanaged borderline or narcissistic personality disorder. We'll explore the emotional exhaustion that often leads to the choice of going no contact and the societal pressures that can make you doubt this decision. Full disclosure- the audio on th…
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Emotionally vulnerability with a parent who has unmanaged borderline personality disorder or narcissistic personality disorder is always a bad idea. But, it's hard to not get sucked into those feel good moments- so what should you do? Listen to this episode of "You're Not Crazy" to hear my thoughts on the many complicated layers of being emotionall…
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Feeling stuck in a relationship with a parent who has borderline or narcissistic personality disorder can be overwhelming. The fear of triggering them can leave you feeling paralyzed and like you have no options. But here’s the thing: doing nothing is making a choice—and it’s probably not the one that serves you best. In this episode, I share pract…
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Today I share about my own childhood growing up with a narcissistic parent. I talk about why it's been such a struggle for me to really accept my mother's narcissism and how becoming a parent myself has made me much less sympathetic to my mother's poor parenting journey. Also, thank you to all of our new Patreon members! I'm so excited to see the Y…
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In this episode, we talk about self-compassion and why it is so hard to develop for adults who grew up with emotionally unpredictable parents. I dive deep into why an emotionally safe space is essential for developing self-compassion and ways you can practice being kinder to yourself starting today. Support the show Exciting News: The Confident Bou…
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In this week's special bonus episode, I share about how this little podcast that could is growing- thanks to you! Whether you're seeking extra support, insightful Q&A sessions, or just some good company on bi-monthly Zoom chats, our brand-new Patreon community has got you covered. But, don't worry- our weekly Tuesday podcasts aren't going anywhere!…
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In this episode of "You're Not Crazy," I answer the questions you sent in about dealing with parents who have borderline and narcissistic personality disorders. Hear my thoughts, advice, personal experiences, and more in the first question and answer episode of the podcast! Support the show Exciting News: The Confident Boundaries Online Community i…
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What happens when the very people meant to guide and nurture you leave you questioning your own emotions and self-worth? On this episode of You're Not Crazy, we tackle the complex aftermath of being raised by parents with borderline and/or narcissistic personality disorders, unraveling the mystery of how this impacts our adult lives. Listen for adv…
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Today, I'm talking about the frustrating reality of dealing with parents who continue to display toxic behaviors despite years of therapy. I share a personal story about my own mother who insisted her therapist told her she no longer needed therapy. Then, I discuss why some therapists are not be equipped to work with clients who have personality di…
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Today I share my journey from being a skeptic of the coaching industry to launching my own coaching business, Confident Boundaries, earlier this year. You'll hear about my initial frustrations with the unregulated nature of coaching, especially during the COVID-19 boom, and how I came to recognize a pressing need for accessible support for adults w…
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This week, I tell you why I absolutely refuse to help you suppress your emotional reactions to your parent's toxic behaviors. Listen to hear me out and why I instead recommend focusing on setting boundaries with your parent who has borderline and/or narcissistic personality disorder. Also, I share why this episode is a little late! As always- thank…
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So sorry this episode was up a little late- thanks for bearing with me! Can you really accept a painful reality without liking it? In this episode of "You're Not Crazy" I share why radical acceptance, a crucial skill for adult children dealing with parents who have borderline and narcissistic personality disorders, can help you do just that. Unders…
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This week on You're Not Crazy, I chat about why I loathe the Tony Robbins of the world and why you need to be careful about being the target of charismatic people who want to exploit you. Growing up with parents affected by borderline or narcissistic personality disorders can distort our sense of self and intuition, making us prime targets for re-t…
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Ever feel paralyzed by the thought of setting a boundary, let alone enforcing it? You’re not alone. Many of us didn't grow up witnessing healthy boundary-setting, and it can feel like an insurmountable task to learn it as an adult (but good news- it's not!). In this episode, I discuss practical steps and strategies to help you navigate the path tow…
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Let's talk about common forms of parental manipulation and abuse. Today, we pull back the curtain on the dysfunctional tactics employed by parents with borderline and narcissistic personality disorders. Has your reality has been twisted through gaslighting? Were family rivalries created through triangulation? Today's episode reveals how guilt-tripp…
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Can trauma from growing up with a parent with borderline or narcissistic personality disorder shape the way you see yourself? On this episode of "You're Not Crazy," I'm pulling back the curtain on my own experiences growing up as the child of a parent with unmanaged BPD. For years, I worried that I might have borderline personality disorder (BPD) m…
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Thinking about going no contact with a parent who has borderline or narcissistic personality disorder? Be careful about how you execute that plan and what advice you follow—a recommendation by a popular therapist YouTuber of sending a letter is probably the worst idea I've ever heard. Join me, Torie Wiksell, as I unpack why this seemingly empowerin…
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Finding the right therapist can feel like navigating a minefield, especially when you're dealing with the complexities of a parent with borderline or narcissistic personality disorder. Ever been told to maintain contact with toxic family members because it's "good for your mental health"? I have, and let me tell you, it was eye-opening—and not in a…
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What if understanding your anger could be the key to your emotional freedom? Join me, Torie Wiksell, on "You're Not Crazy" as we explore the intricate and often terrifying relationship that adult children of parents with Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) and Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD) have with anger. Growing up in these environmen…
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Welcome to You're Not Crazy: A Podcast for the Adult Children of Parents with Borderline and Narcissistic Personality Disorders. Hosted by therapist and coach Torie Wiksell, this podcast is dedicated to those who have grown up trying to navigate the complicated and challenging realities of having a parent with borderline or narcissistic personality…
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Why do some parents claim they had no idea their adult child would cut them off? Discover the reasons behind this disconnect when adult children going no contact with their parents in this episode of "You're Not Crazy." I'm Torie Wiksell, your host and a seasoned therapist and coach, and today we unpack the complex dynamics that lead to family estr…
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