Land of Frowns: Ed Details Lessons Learned from a Thai Divorce [S7.E5]

The Bangkok Podcast

We’re getting a bit personal on this episode as Ed talks about his marriage and eventual divorce in Thailand. Although it’s a difficult topic, enough time has elapsed that Ed is ready to discuss whether or not his experience provides any lessons for expats in the Land of Smiles (and sometimes frowns).

First, Greg asks Ed about the actual legal procedure of getting a divorce and whether it involved a lot of paperwork. In Ed’s case, the process was easy because it was by agreement; the only hitch was the need for two witnesses, which was solved by paying a random motorbike guy 100 baht to be the second witness (seriously). For more complex legal angles that must be considred, the guys plan to have resident lawyer Dave back on a later show to explain all the details.

Second, Ed does his best to try to figure out a possible lesson for other expats. On the one hand, every relationship is unique and can succeed or fail for a lot of reasons having nothing to do with cross-cultural issues. But Ed does come up with one insight: he feels that he had the habit of always taking his wife at her word in an almost legalistic way. Ed references previous shows where the ‘high context’ nature of Thai culture was discussed. Thais tend not to rely so much on what people say, but read a lot into what is unspoken. Ed wonders whether his failure to recognize this led to communication issues. Since his wife spoke English well, it certainly wasn’t language.

Greg chimes in with a few insights from his own marriage, and both guys try to fashion some advice for expats looking to tie the knot with a Thai partner. Chok dee from the Bangkok Podcast!

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