Hush Hush, Nellie Oleson

Super True Stories

Kelly is a no-budget horror film director who often casts his movies from Craig’s List and whoever happens to be on set. He’s just wrapped on The Mephisto Box, a film featuring telekinesis, astral travel, flying daggers, and a woman in a wheelchair restoring her legs through the power of Satan.

But his film is missing something! It needs more production value, and by that he means more action, more blood, a submissive who can resurrect the dead, and a new lead character played by Alison Arngrim, aka Nellie Oleson from Little House of the Prairie.

Before it’s all said and done Kelly will film over 100 hours of footage, and we’ll see TV’s Nellie Oleson pay homage to her past, kill a man wearing a bird feeder on his groin, and make a very unappetizing S’more.

We’re left feeling like no kitchen sink is safe from Kelly, but we are absolutely won over by Alison’s good-natured charm.

Featuring guest appearances by Werner Herzog, Promise Keepers, that “Heaven is for Real” kid, and a European accent we can’t quite place.

We're suffering through and reporting back on Hush Hush, Nellie Oleson, available to stream on Amazon Prime.

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Theme music: "Mexicana Massacre" by Tomb Dragomir off his Instrumental Psycho Synth Album