022. Biblical Foundations for Grief Ministry: An Interview with Julie Lynn Ashley

Preparing the Church for the Harvest

Julie Lynn Ashley is a grief coach with a passion for helping people who have experienced loss. Her ministry provides one-on-one support to those struggling with grief, offering a safe, open space for discussion and processing. She believes that grieving people need someone to sit with them through the process and stay attuned to important dates, and she encourages local churches to provide support by keeping funeral programs and following up on those dates. With a biblical foundation and a master's degree in thanatology, Julie Lynn is well-equipped to help those in need.

Grief Ministry

When Julie Lynn and her husband moved to Texas several years ago she was looking to get to know people and connect in the community. The wife of a couple they knew suggested she volunteer with a local hospice group. Though she had never done that type of work, she was willing to give it a chance. Almost immediately Julie Lynn was drawn to the bereavement side of the program. She realized she had a God-given passion for people who had experienced this loss and were left with this giant hole in their life.

At a GriefShare meeting one evening, she felt this new calling in her life. She shares; “I was watching one of the videos, and the room was dark, and it kind of washed over me from head to toe, God saying, Julie Lynn, this is Act 2. This is what I want you to do with the rest of your life”.

At that moment she had no idea how things would play out and that she would get her Master’s Degree of Science in Thanatology (death, grief, and bereavement). The local Hospice Chaplain provided resources and God provided mightily as she attended grad school.

After receiving her degree she went to work in the Hospice industry, specifically on the bereavement side, doing brief follow-up calls with families. Then she transitioned into her ministry, where she is working one-on-one with people. She can go deeper with each individual than she was able to in the Hospice industry while she was following up with hundreds of families.

Biblical Foundation

There are two key scriptures that Julie Lynn references in her ministry. The first one is Philippians 1:6, “He who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus”. This is a verse that Julie Lynn clung to as she traveled the mysterious journey to where she is now. It is also a verse she shares with clients that she works with. It shows that God has something for them in the middle of the pain that they're going through.

The second scripture is in Isaiah 61:1, “...the Lord has anointed me to proclaim good news to the poor. He has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted…”

What Grieving People Need

1. Someone to sit with them through the grieving process

One thing that grieving people need is someone willing to sit in the dissonance with them. Grief is not something that will ever be fixed on this side of heaven. That chair will always be empty at Thanksgiving dinner. It's not going to be fixed. God only made one of the person that they lost. So grieving people are looking for someone to sit with them, and not try to rush them through the grieving process.

2. Someone to stay attuned to those very specific, important dates.

It is good to keep the program from the funeral or the obituary. It gives several very important dates. This one document will give you the death date, the birth date, and if married the anniversary date. Sometimes a grieving person's own extended family doesn't connect the need with those specific dates. So people, being tuned to those dates for a grieving person is extremely powerful, as they're walking through these days, adjusting to life on earth without their loved one.

How the Local Church can Help:

1. Keep the funeral program and assign someone to follow up on those important dates.

This could be done by the pastor, staff, or small group that the person was involved with. Ways to follow up could be a text, a card, or a phone call. For those who are close, maybe even a visit. Some churches keep an Excel spreadsheet of these dates and share them each month with the appropriate people.

2. Consider having a Blue Christmas Service

Several churches across the United States do this. There are some websites out there that can give you some good ideas on how to form a Blue Christmas service. It can be very powerful in the life of a grieving person around the holidays, to have their church acknowledge their loss.

3. Download this resource sheet

Julie Lynn has compiled a list of organizations that support grief in other ways. From infant to adult loss and groups that support teenagers as well as parents, there are many associations out there you can get involved with. Download this list and keep it in your “resource toolbox”

Are you being called to grief ministry?

If you have been touched by this article and want to get more involved, consider volunteering at a local hospice organization. There are a lot of different ways to get involved. You don't have to begin by working directly with patients. There may be administrative tasks that you can help with or ask about other ways to get involved.

Another idea would be to check out other support systems in your community. There are organizations such as GriefShare and Compassionate Friends that churches can be a part of. There are several groups listed on the resource sheet. You can check out their websites to see if there are organized programs in your area or if you would like to start something.

Resources:

Grief Support Resource List: Grief Support Resource List — Julie Lynn Ashley

Connect with Julie Lynn Ashley

• Email: [e-mail]

• Website: Julie Lynn Ashley

Connect with Jacklin:

• Effective Ministry Solutions Facebook

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• Preparing the Church for the Harvest Blog

• Schedule a Call

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This episode was originally published on effectiveministrysolutions.com/episode022.