Truck Festival Review – 2015

Bristol Beats Club Comedy Podcasts

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It’s our Truck Festival 2015 review. Listen now (or download from iTunes/Stitcher).

https://www.bristolbeatsclub.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/07/truck-fest-review-2015.mp3

And for those of you that insist on reading…

The Bristol Beats Club make podcasts. It’s what we do. But we know some of you prefer the written word.

If you’re one of those people, you’ll find the transcript of the above podcast below… so fill your boots. But be warned!

As the review was only ever meant to be consumed in podcast format, it doesn’t really make sense when read. And, if you do go ahead and read it, we’ll think less of you. You’re better than that.

So the choice is yours. But listen. Don’t read. Merci.

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Intro: Some Explanatory notes

Ladies and gentlemen, boys & girls and (perhaps especially relevant in this particular review) children of all ages: thanks very much for tuning in to this very special podcast review of Truck festival 2015.

Before we begin, the usual Bristol Beats Club explanatory notes.

As some of you already know, the Bristol Beats Club are unlike most other music journalists. In fact, whilst the majority of Truck festival press were busy publicising live on-site Truck festival updates, we favoured several rounds of live cider pong and a marathon game of danger can.

And that means that our reviews are very rarely rank and file play by play accounts of which bands played what at a music festival.

Yep, and instead, they’re exactly what you, a member of the normal and fun loving general public, can expect to experience on attendance of a gig or music festival – should you buy a ticket.

A ticket, we might add, that in this instance is creeping ever-closer to the £100 mark. Which makes this review more essential than ever before.

Should you really be splurging on such a ticket? Or are you better off investing in another of the plethora of small music festivals now available to you both inside and outside of the UK?

That’s exactly what we aimed to find out as we attended Truck 2015, so listen on for the outcome.

As always, the Bristol Beats Club aims neither to offend nor entertain anyone.

And, as Daim said way back in the very first podcast, ‘we’re not necessarily in the business of factual representations of things’

So enjoy the ride. And, on that note…

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Creatively rearranging your three-year anniversary

When our Truck Festival 2015 invitation first arrived, I was less excited than I was terrified. Because it meant I had around 12 hours to convince my life partner, Hanna, that I’d be unable to attend our three year anniversary. Not wishing to tackle the problem head on, I contacted Daim.

And when my Truck Festival 2015 arrived, I was disheartened. Because, for reasons that consist primarily of cowardice, I was for sure not going to be able to attend the festival whatsoever.

But this brief encounter granted me hope! For, with Daim dropping out, my anniversary with my life partner now no longer had to be skipped. Instead, it could simply be rearranged!

And that’s more or less how I ended up not at a fancy restaurant or a swanky bar celebrating my three year anniversary, but in a field in the middle of no-where, drinking Captain Morgan’s from a coke bottle whilst snacking on Wasabi peanuts and, as I’m told is customary, a mountain of breakfast biscuits.

Yes, Beats Clubbers, in what proved to be a frankly rather inspired move, I took my girlfriend, Hanna – hello Hanna –

Greetings!

Along to Truck with me. It was your classic two birds with one stone scenario.

Yes two birds killed, but you did seemingly attempt to moderate my behaviour for almost the entire weekend.

Agreed, Hanna’s point is undeniable. But in my defence, when, on arrival, you started saying stuff like:

‘It’s a lovely field! With lovely dry grass!’

Something had to be done. So, naturally, I went about educating Hanna in the ways of the Beats Club.

‘The first rule of the Bristol Beats Club is, debauchery of all kinds is actively encouraged.’

I meanwhile, stayed at home.

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Truck clearly put a lot of thought into the festival line up

And whilst Daim was at home, we had arrived on a gloriously sunny day and were beginning to take in the delights of the festival – dry grass included.

So, as we flicked through the programme looking which acts we wanted to check out, we were treated to a bout of glorious sunshine.

In fact it was almost a shame that both DID (formally Dog is Dead) and Darwin Deez took place within the confines of the market tent.

But of course Augustines commanded the open air main stage, in what was Friday’s stand out act.

Alongside the Charlatans, of course, the headliners. In fact, it’s pretty clear that Truck have put a lot of thought and effort into the line up. Although they weren’t for the Bristol Beats Club, Clean Bandit also made an appearance on the Friday – which proves there’s an eclectic line up with something for everyone.

And there’s a serious focus on new music here, too, to the extent that it’s almost certain you’ll at some point be able to nonchalantly brag to your friends that you prefer a band like Neon Waltz’s old stuff, from back when you saw them in a small tent in Oxfordshire alongside a crowd of just over 100 people, before they sold out, went mainstream and started headlining stages at festivals beginning with G.

But I, of course, will never have such a privilege.

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The food: on the whole good, be celiacs beware

Somewhere on that Friday eve, we needed to eat.

Which is often a pain in the arse for Hanna.

Well, yes, I’m gluten free! But at music festivals, my dietary requirements are rarely a problem. In fact, it’s often easier to eat at music festivals than it is outside of music festivals – there’s usually all sorts of diets catered for at these things, right?

At Truck, though, this wasn’t the case. Now don’t get us wrong: some of the food here is outstanding. And reasonably priced, too. And – in an unprecedented move on the music festival circuit – a lot of it’s for a bloody good cause. In fact, there’s a whole food hall – which this year exhibited casseroles, pizzas, grills, currys, burgers and veg boxes – run by volunteers putting all proceeds to charity: a highly commendable feat.

Very commendable, but it left very little for those of us with gluten or wheat intolerances to tuck into.

So, non-gluteners, you had curry. Or chips. Or another form of curry. Or chips. Or, what Hanna went for, a beef burger with a bit of bacon on top in a tissue without a bun. Such was the variety poised.

But then I had queued for 30 minutes for a curry, only to be told there was at that point no curry available.

Again, the queues at this place are somewhat unprecedented. And constant. They very rarely diminish to an acceptable level. Which meant for the second time in a month, I was relegated to eating nought but wasabi peanuts on that first festival eve.

And me, a beef burger with a bit of bacon on top in a tissue without a bun.

But when you consider the vast majority of this is run by volunteers, entirely for charity, so long as you’re willing to eat normally –

As I absolutely would have been –

Then the food is actually plentiful – and bloody well priced too. To give you an idea a smoothie – which might cost close to a fiver elsewhere – was on offer for just two bucks – it’s a small price to pay for life’s ultimate hangover cure.

And a full meal will cost you a fiver.

I, meanwhile, stayed at home.

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After hours entertainment. (Be sure to check out the Palm City Stage.)

Fed, watered and excited post-Charlatans, it was time to check out what Truck could offer in the way of after hours entertainment. A true staple for an avid festival goer.

First, it was the turn of the silent disco. Which, we’re sad to report, was in many ways more silent than it was disco.

There were some technical difficulties, weren’t there, which meant two things. One, that anything DJ Luck & MC Neat attempted to play cut in and out sporadically and was heavily interspersed with that fuzzy sound you used to get when changing channels on an analogue TV.

And two, that, in one of the more comical moments of the festival, all silent disco goers – desperately searching for reception – congregated like ants in one sole corner of the silent arena, leaving vast swathes of space entirely unoccupied – a bemusing scenario that I’d love to see played back at some point in the future.

So after a while we gave up on the silent disco and went in search of more fertile evening entertainment… in what would prove to be a festival highlight.

Truckers: if you do end up going to Truck, be sure to check out the Palm City Stage: a simply excellent small collection of intoxicated and fun loving festival-goers housed in a tent accessed via a tunnel. A hidden Truck festival gem.

In a moment of hilarity, my life partner – a 5 foot 4 petite brunette from a small village in Somerset, who was a few hours earlier commenting on the ‘lovely field and the lovely dry grass’ the festival had provided us with – had to be restrained by bouncers for climbing tent poles, which more or less signalled the end of what in my book was now a very successful day 1 of the festival, while Daim, of course…

Stayed at home.

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This festival is seriously family friendly

My head hurt when I woke up. Largely because I woke up early. Really early. To the sound of happy children playing in the background.

Family festival goers: Truck festival is for you. I have literally seen nothing like it before. There are kids all over the place here – and a lot for them to do.

Truck have actually won awards for their family friendly vibe. Kids can play on the circus games. They can ride the helter skelter. Or have a spin on the ferris wheel. And Truck will give you headphones for the tots too, protecting their small ears.

But why were there so many kids nearby? Rising at this most unholy of hours?

Because the Bristol Beats Club had inadvertently camped in family camping.

There’s no need to wake up early if you’d rather lie in. The lovely people at Truck have separated campsites, so families can get a decent night’s sleep – followed by a turbulent morning – and youngsters can stay up long into the night being all raucous then catch some slumber in the early hours.

The Bristol Beats Club, however, did neither.

We stayed up late. I was educating Hanna, after all. But we did not lie in. There were children about. I began to feel ashamed for having a sly widdle nearby at some point during the night. What had I become?

Neither of us wanted to be alone with our own thoughts. So we arose. And, as Chris put it that morning, it was time for a customary Bristol beats Club shower.

Now, I can’t imagine many of you shower at music festivals. But give it a go. You have no idea how much better you’ll feel. We collected our things and headed over.

Only to be told the showers were out of action.

Yep, the showers, introduced new to truck for 2015, had gone down at prime showering time. And it didn’t seem likely they’d be back up before the evening.

Fortunately for Truck, the festival currently stands at just two days long. So a shower isn’t necessarily essential.

But nonetheless, they were out of commission. Which meant, after some sly R+R in another glorious day of sunshine, it was back to the music for us.

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Budget conscious? Then Truck is for you.

Cheeky up and coming act Rat Boy were first on the Bristol Beats Club bill – and played exactly the kind of spirit lifting set you need after a night of climbing tent poles and eating tissu-ee burgers.

And after accepting the invitation of a jaunt with the band on stage, we headed deeper into the festival to explore some of Truck’s miscellaneous treats.

You know what we’re talking about here – the added extras. The above and beyonds. With Truck, they do their bit for charity. And they’re accommodating for families.

And we couldn’t go a single second further without mentioning the fact that, this year at least, courtesy of the good people at Victor’s drinks, they’d laid on free cider pong!

This is on top of the fact that the entire festival is bring your own booze! Bring as much booze as you fancy – decanted, of course – then have more booze on us! A truly inspired piece.

And something that means Truck can certainly be done on the cheap. Good music, glorious sunshine and a whole load of fun in a budget friendly environment. It’s elsewhere unheard of.

Budget conscious?

Then this one’s for you. Now, we should mention, the Bristol Beats Club had the pleasure of befriending the beautiful cider pong staff members.

Which meant that we had far more of Victor’s cider than we’d ever intended to…

Truck Festival: ‘An epic weekend for the Bristol Beats Club’

The day spiralled out of control. Saint Raymond were on. As was Rae Morris. We played Danger Can. To the rhythms of Public Service Broadcasting. Hanna ate some curry. Before, realistically, the festival’s main attraction.

As dusk kicked in, The Bristol Beats Club were front and centre, all up in the mosh pit, for the theatrics of Basement Jaxx.

I looked to my immediate left. And, not surprisingly, the audience included a child of no older than five, watching alongside a parent that had far from given up on life in the way the Bristol Beats parents did long ago.

And owing largely to the cider, the Basement Jaxx capped off what was both an epic day and an epic weekend for the Bristol Beats Club.

So Hanna says, of course. Because by this point, her education was well and truly complete. And, as she put it in her own words the following morning:

‘I was so drunk last night I can’t even remember the Basement Jaxx’.

All whilst I, of course, stayed at home.

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Discover some awesome new indietronica bands

Well, Beats Clubbers, that just about concludes our Truck Festival 2015 review. Before we sign off there’s just one more thing to say.

If you like music, and you like festivals, then subscribe to the show on iTunes.

Or Stitcher. Or the podcast app of your choice.

We’re not podcasting regularly at the moment, but whenever we do, you lucky subscribers will be the first to know.

And you’ll get the inside scoop on new indie, electro and indietronica music, as well as exactly what goes down at select music festivals – so you’ll know exactly what to expect.

And of course, whether or not it’s for you. In the case of Truck, it’s for families, the budget conscious, and those interested in new music. Which pretty much covers all bases. If you fancy fun, get your ticket – at the time of writing, 2016 early birds are on sale now.

And if you don’t, why on earth are you still listening?

Thanks very much for tuning in.

And bye from me! Enjoy your week!

Love you all, you sexy things.

Your friendly neighbourhood Bristol Beats. Xx

All images courtesy of Licklist.co.uk

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