Episode 762: Todd (gay) and Tanya (straight) Hughes, Recently Divorced, Staying Close

Listen, Learn & Love Hosted by Richard Ostler

My friends Todd and Tanya Hughes (live in Ventura County CA, married for 29 years, recently divorced, still best friends) join us to share their story. Todd (who recently turned 50) shares his background growing up gay in the church, and all the shame and self-hate that came with that. Todd and Tanya met on their missions and ended up getting married, after Todd told her he was gay during their courtship. Todd talks about how church teachings have evolved and how raising a queer and transgender son helped Todd learn that he is an intentionally created gay Son of God, and that God loves all of him. Over the past few years, that has led Todd and Tanya to a decision to end their marriage—but remain friends (including still sitting on the same church pew together). Tanya and Todd talk about their beautiful marriage, parenting a transgender son, and how they continue to help/support each other. Both Tanya and Todd have insights to support spouses of mixed-orientation marriages and better support/love/understand those whose marriages end. Tanya talks about how she still has hope for her “eternal family” and how it just has been reconfigured. Todd (who still actively serves in the church) talks about his intentions to date and then marry a man and participate as much as possible in the Church. Neither Todd nor Tanya are inviting others to a similar path—just bravely sharing their story in hopes to help others walking a similar road and to help all of us better love our fellow Latter-day Saints. Thank you, Todd and Tanya, for being on the podcast. You are two remarkable, courageous, and faithful Latter-day Saints. Your courage to share your story helps so many. Todd’s e-mail: [e-mail] Social media: IG (Todd): @todd.hughes.in.ca IG (Tanya): @tanyainsocal Latest Church Teachings: www.churchofjesuschrist.org/study/manual/gospel-topics/same-sex-attraction Facebook Group to support LGBTQ Latter-day Saints: www.facebook.com/groups/1433556613672143