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The Academic Non-Monogamous podcast, reading the texts that have shaped our community and culture. BOOKS! In Season one, Sebastian and Claire are closely reading The Ethical Slut by Janet W. Hardy and Dossie Easton [3rd edition] chapter by chapter, discussing the ideas in an unabridged way, adding extra info where needed, and suggesting extra readings. Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/polypages/support
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In Season Two, join host Krista Varela Posell as we read The Polyamory Breakup Book by Kathy Labriola. In this episode Krista is joined by guest host Michelle Hy from Polyamorous While Asian: polyamorous blogger, content creator and fresh from the Smith's Red Table. In this episode they discuss Part Two of the book and ways to prevent polyamorous b…
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In Season Two, join host Krista Varela Posell as we read The Polyamory Breakup Book by Kathy Labriola. In this episode Krista is joined by guest host Sydney Rae Chin, survivor and non-monogamous sexual healing coach, to discuss Part Three of the book which goes over ways to survive polyamorous break-ups. You can support Poly Pages on Instagram and …
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In Season Two, join host Krista Varela Posell as we read The Polyamory Breakup Book by Kathy Labriola. In this episode Krista is joined by guest host Laura Boyle, author of Ready for Polyamory, to discuss Part One of the book which goes over the 7 most common causes of break-ups. You can support Poly Pages on Instagram and TikTok @polypages. You ca…
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Decoupling in Polyamory; a global live event, on the 9th January. Get tickets at here, at www.polypages.org/events, or join our Patreon as an Early Bird Supporters and get in completely free. www.patreon.com/polypages De-coupling is the transition from a partnership - usually romantic and intimate - to another dynamic. In polyamorous dynamics, brea…
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In this bonus episode, Claire is joined by Andy Adams, from the Growth Arc. Together they read through Life History and Multi-Partner Mating: A Novel Explanation for Moral Stigma Against Consensual Non-monogamy. The article uses a new categorization for CNM - either multi-partner or open relationship. And they exclude non-consensual non-monogamy (y…
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In this bonus episode, Sebastian is joined by special guest co-host Matthew Thomas, a polyamorous lawyer from Somerville, MA to talk about a recently passed ordinance which expands the definition of domestic partnership beyond two people. Not only is this an incredible step forward for poly people, but this ordinance is likely the first of its kind…
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In chapter 18, Dossie and Janet are talking about a stereotypical if problematic entry point to non-monogamy. A person in a dyad (couple) has got involved with an outside lover, and this is the impetus for discussions about opening up your partnership to accommodate. Although neither of our hosts have come to polyamory this way, Claire and Sebastia…
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This exercise is called ‘8 steps to win-win conflict resolution’ and is found in Chapter 17 of the Ethical Slut (3rd edition). For the full chapter, please see the full episode: Making Agreements (Ep17) and don’t forget to rate and review and subscribe to Poly Pages for more content. This exercise provides a useful framework to agree solutions for …
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Claire and Sebastain, 2 polyamorous people, are talking about making agreements. After fangirling over a great definition of consent - ‘the active collaboration for the pleasure and well-being of all concerned’- Claire and Sebastain talk about the power of making explicit our agreements. Avoiding legalistic hair splitting, moral condemnation, manip…
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This exercise is called ‘Feelings Dyad’ and is found in Chapter 16 of the Ethical Slut third edition. If you want about the full chapter, please see the full episode: Embracing Conflict (ep 16) and don’t forget to rate and review and subscribe to Poly Pages for more content. This exercise provides a useful framework to share your feelings in a safe…
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Claire and Sebastian are talking about conflict in intimate relationships. We have probably learnt that conflict is bad, and we don't usually spend a lot of time thinking about how we behave in and after conflicts. Dossie and Janet contend that conflict is actually a good thing, giving us opportunities to learn more about each other and ourselves. …
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This exercise is called ‘Treasures’ and is found in Chapter 15 of the Ethical Slut third edition. If you want about the full chapter, please see the full episode: Roadmaps through Jealousy (ep 15) and don’t forget to rate and review a subscribe to Poly Pages for more content. This exercise is designed to help you and your partner(s) to remember the…
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This exercise is called ’15 ways to be kind to yourself’and is found in Chapter 15 of the Ethical Slut third edition. If you want about the full chapter, please see the full episode: Roadmaps through Jealousy (ep 15) and don’t forget to rate and review a subscribe to Poly Pages for more content. This exercise is designed to help you, the reader, to…
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This exercise is called ‘Reassurance’ and is found in Chapter 15 of the Ethical Slut third edition. If you want about the full chapter, please see the full episode: Roadmaps through Jealousy (ep 15) and don’t forget to rate and review a subscribe to Poly Pages for more content. This exercise is designed for you, the reader, to consider how you woul…
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This exercise is called ‘How do you experience jealousy?’ and is found in Chapter 15 of the Ethical Slut third edition. If you want about the full chapter, please see the full episode: Roadmaps through Jealousy (ep 15) and don’t forget to rate and review a subscribe to Poly Pages for more content. This is an exercise designed to facilitate introspe…
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15 - Roadmaps through Jealousy
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As Part Three kicks off, Claire and Sebastian talk through Chapter 15 and it's all about the green-eyed monster: what is jealousy? why is it scary? should we avoid it or learn how to work with it? This episode is packed full of excellent resources on how to speak about jealousy, how to self-sooth when you are experiencing it, and how to exercise sh…
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Claire and Sebastian slide into your feed to give you a little status update. After six months of hiatus, Poly Pages is ramping up to release Part Three of Season One entitled "Navigating Challenges". And we are giving you plenty of time to dust off your copy of The Ethical Slut and get ready! Check out the chapter-by-chapter recap on our Instagram…
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BONUS - Non-monogamy agreements and safer sex behaviors
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In this bonus episode, we are joined by special guest co-host Jenelle Marie Pierce of The STI Project: Breaking the Stigma®, to discuss whether non-monogamy agreements can improve ones perceived sense of sexual self-control, and therefore make us more likely to engage in condom negotiation and use. And boy, do we get in it! Reading a fantastic arti…
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In this freestanding bonus episode, Claire and Sebastian are joined by special guest co-host Michael Hagg to discuss whether Polyamory is an identity, intimate practice or sexual orientation. In their 2014 article, Kleese surveys academic and activist discussions on sexual orientation and traces contradictory voices in current debates on polyamory.…
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In Chapter 14, Childrearing, Claire and Sebastian cover media representation of multi-parent households, how to talk to your kids about sex and non-monogamy, and how to navigate entering and exiting family structures as a solo-poly. But there is an elephant in the room but not in the book - culture. Claire talks about childrearing in polyamorous un…
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Let's talk about sex. Chapter 13 is brought to you from bed, as Claire and Sebastian discuss how to keep your sex life safe. From barriers to family planning to drugs and alcohol we explore safety from all sides. No matter your relationships, or the type of intimacy you are engaging in it is essential that you be informed before making decisions. I…
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Can we buy you a drink? Claire and Sebastian talk about flirting and cruising in Chapter 12 and what those really mean. Is it possible to flirt without any other motive? And how do gender and identity impact our approaches to flirting and approaching others? Claire adds that online dating has drastically changed how people interact. Sebastian empha…
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Claire and Sebastian talk about how NOT to do polyamory. The ethics of multi-partner living are discussed through examples of poor behavior outlined in Chapter 11 of the Ethical Slut. Claire and Sebastian both have new examples to add to the mix - begging the questions, is polyamory different in the modern internet driven world of dating? Slut-sham…
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As we dive into the murky waters of Chapter 10, Boundaries, Claire and Sebastian find themselves disappointed. A clear understanding of boundaries is fundamental to your health, happiness and your polyamory, and a hot topic in the community. So listen as our hosts attempt to paint a clear picture of what the authors are trying to say. You can suppo…
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In Episode 9, Slut Skills, we look at Hardy and Dossie’s suggested tools for successful relationships. Claire uncovers the philosophical assumptions implied in this chapter, and we suggest some additions to our metaphorical toolbelt – saying sorry, defining words, forgiveness of others, assuming the best. Finishing up, Sebastian sets us all some af…
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Claire and Sebastian dive into Part Two of the Ethical Slut, and in Chapter 8 we tackle Abundance. There is more than you need! Unpacking the imagined fear of starvation, we find that sex, love, friendship and support are probably never going run out if we all just chill a little bit. When talking about finite resources such as time, money, space a…
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BONUS - Poly-Hegemonic Masculinities
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In this freestanding bonus episode, Claire and Sebastian are joined by special guest co-host Michael Greer to discuss how masculinity is defined and challenged in non-monogamous spaces. In her 2006 article, Sheff explores the ways that polyamorous men, through their emotional expressions and management, are complicit with, subordinate to, and resis…
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Claire and Sebastian connect long distance to discuss the many different ways we relate to one another. From monkish celibacy to orgies to multiple life partners, there are so many way to practice intentional relationships it's almost overwhelming. But Claire and Sebastian still find something missing and talk about political anarchy, metamours and…
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**Trigger warning: In this episode we discuss consent in depth as well as violations of consent and different types of trauma. If this is something you aren’t comfortable hearing or thinking about, please don’t listen to this episode. Know that you are not alone, it will get better, and we love you. ** How can we build an intentional culture of con…
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In Episode 5, Claire and Sebastian enumerate the multiple barriers to safe, positive sexual and romantic relationships. From the lack of legal support for consensual, multiple partner living to the shame we carry inside ourselves. From lack of access to comprehensive family planning, to cultural norms that slut shame and victim blame. It's a cruel …
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Back at it, Sebastian and Claire are still together in Boston because Claire has missed her flight! They talk about all the ways 'sluthood' has been expressed through the ages, and in different subcultures, and in the end, we feel less alone in our difference. We talk about being queer, coming out, and skillfully avoid explaining what pegging is wh…
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Join genuine poly pair, Claire and Sebastian as they critically read the Ethical Slut by Janet W Hardy and Dossie Easton. In chapter 3, Our Beliefs we get into the values at the core of polyam and non mono culture, disagree on the definition of sex and talk about what listeners can expect from future episodes. Unabridged and explicit. Show Notes: T…
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2 - Myths and Realities
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Genuine poly couple, Sebastian and Claire, take you through a close and critical reading of The Ethical Slut, by Janet W. Hardy and Dossie Easton. In this unabridged episode we dive into the details of Chapter Two: Myths and Realities. Both in Boston, Claire still can't pronounce 'Dossie', and Sebastian comments on being queer. Some spoilers on Par…
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Sebastian and Claire embark on The Ethical Slut by Janet W Hardy and Dossie Easton. In Chapter 1; Who is an Ethical Slut, we talk through the intro to this edition, language and Kinsey style rebellion. Show Notes: The Making It Work Podcast interviewed Dossie Easton in Nov 2014 (episode 13). Find on Stitcher here. The Kinsey Institute can be found …
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