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Much to our surprise, Whastrach is not the honest businessman that he seemed! The allure of blue gold is greater than any moral calling, and he is out to rob the Whalaqee of their ceruleum-rich canyon. To stop him, we'll have to beat him... in the Masked Carnivale! Join us for 25 thrilling rounds of blue mage combat in the conclusion to the A Realm…
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We put on our best blues and get to work on the Blue Mage storyline! Who is Martyn and why is he always poor? Why are we STILL susceptible to high-pressure sales tactics? Why are half these spells redundant? Find out in this continuation of our A Realm Reborn Blue Mage Series! You can reach us at: https://discord.gg/SUHTBVMVxj podreturnffxiv@gmail …
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A shady showman entangles us in his misdeeds. His wares? Blue Magic kits, or a good way to get yourself killed. We rise to the challenge though, and take the first steps of our Blue Mage adventure! We also collect a whole lotta spells. Join us for the beginning of our FFXIV Blue Mage series! You can reach us at: https://discord.gg/SUHTBVMVxj podret…
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We had the best of intentions when we cleared out the traps and critters from this Belah'dian temple to Azeyma. All we accomplished though was fostering a false sense of security - which was promptly shattered when some opportunistic tomb robbers blundered into the temple. Now, another round of wards and wardens has cropped up, trapping the lead re…
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Capitalizing on our loss of the Blessing of Light, the Ascians take the battle to our inner sanctum. Now is the time to put our Ascian-killing theories to the test. Join us for the conclusion to the Final Fantasy 14 patch 2.5 MSQ! You can reach us at: https://discord.gg/SUHTBVMVxj podreturnffxiv@gmail https://www.patreon.com/Podreturnffxiv https://…
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Refusing to let Midgardsormr get us down, we get right back on our feet and take the offensive to some imperials. Meanwhile, Moenbryda brings a prototype of her Aetheric Siphon into the field for some tests. But! Things go awry with the appearance of an uninvited interloper. Join us as we continue with the Final Fantasy 14 patch 2.5 main story! You…
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We return to the main scenario quest, kicking off patch 2.5! After yet more drama with the Blades, we are thrust into an existential crisis; courtesy of the Keeper of the Lake. What is a lightless Warrior of Light to do? Join us as we continue with the FFXIV A Realm Reborn main scenario! You can reach us at: https://discord.gg/SUHTBVMVxj podreturnf…
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At last House Durendaire is prepared to retake the Stone Vigil! This is what they've been training for. But, they may need a little help - in the form of the Warrior of Light and their three closest friends. Join us as we crash through this FFXIV hard dungeon like a cannonball! You can reach us at: https://discord.gg/SUHTBVMVxj podreturnffxiv@gmail…
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Hildibrand's adventures come to a head with a showdown against the Phantom Thief. Friends will become foes and foes will become... lovers? A labyrinthine plot awaits us in the finale to our A Realm Reborn Hildy series! You can reach us at: https://discord.gg/SUHTBVMVxj podreturnffxiv@gmail https://www.patreon.com/Podreturnffxiv FINAL FANTASY is a r…
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The Phantom Thief has set their sights upon the prize of the Mythril Cup gladiatorial tournament. Inspector Hildibrand has hastened to intervene, but will his gentlemanly style be enough to secure his victory? Foul deeds and fowl play are afoot in this contest. Join us for part 4 of the A Realm Reborn Hildibrand saga! You can reach us at: https://d…
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Hildibrand returns in A Case of Indecency! The phantom thief seeks to steal the virtue of the legendary beauty known as the Lapis Maiden. The maiden is soon to be betrothed at a Costa del Sol ceremony. We seek to catch the thief before he sours the ceremony, but we'll soon learn that this isn't the only foul play in the arranged union. Join us as w…
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Hildibrand returns in the Case of the Three Collectors! As we struggle to capture the weapon thief, Hildibrand struggles against a new nemesis: Intruding Inspector Briardien. Join us for armament intrigue and family needs in this continuation of the Hildibrand saga! You can reach us at: https://discord.gg/SUHTBVMVxj podreturnffxiv@gmail https://www…
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The Hildibrand saga begins! Our hapless Warrior of Light becomes enmeshed in the bizarre reality of Inspector Hildibrand and his ever-growing entourage as he tracks down a blade-snatching duelist. Suspend your disbelief and pack a spare coatee (or two!) for The Case of The Immaculate Deception. You can reach us at: https://discord.gg/SUHTBVMVxj pod…
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It's another side dungeon, by the onion! The tropical face of Hullbreaker Isle conceals HUGE secrets about a major figure. Krak open the true identity of Mistbeard with us in this FFXIV side story. You can reach us at: https://discord.gg/SUHTBVMVxj podreturnffxiv@gmail https://www.patreon.com/Podreturnffxiv FINAL FANTASY is a registered trademark o…
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The Eye has been kidnapped by Estiniens. Are you a bad enough Dragoon to rescue the Eye of Nidhogg? You can reach us at: https://discord.gg/SUHTBVMVxj podreturnffxiv@gmail https://www.patreon.com/Podreturnffxiv FINAL FANTASY is a registered trademark of Square Enix Holdings Co., Ltd. © SQUARE ENIX CO., LTD. All Rights Reserved. Music from #Uppbeat …
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Previously we entered the Wanderer's Palace on a Tonberry-slaying mission, but now we are on a Tonberry-saving mission! No sooner had we freed the creatures from their rancor than a band of Mamool Ja entered the palace to capture and kill those same Tonberries. We will not let this stand, by the onion! Join us for a Tonberry rescue in the hard vers…
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We finally close out patch 2.4's story with A LOT of cutscenes. Plots and counterplots are cooking as we approach the end of Final Fantasy 14: A Realm Reborn! You can reach us at: https://discord.gg/SUHTBVMVxj podreturnffxiv@gmail https://www.patreon.com/Podreturnffxiv FINAL FANTASY is a registered trademark of Square Enix Holdings Co., Ltd. © SQUA…
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Now that we got The Ivy, it's time to get Shiva! ...As soon as we solve this missing aetheryte problem. Joining us on this adventure will be a special guest from Sharlayan! We look forward to a long and productive collaboration with them. In this episode, we continue with the lengthy patch 2.4 main scenario quest in Final Fantasy 14. You can reach …
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It's time for The Ivy to get trimmed! Evidence be damned, we'll make our move. Also, there is HUGE news in Garlemald! Join us for some light international intrigue in this continuation of the A Realm Reborn patch 2.4 MSQ. You can reach us at: https://discord.gg/SUHTBVMVxj podreturnffxiv@gmail https://www.patreon.com/Podreturnffxiv FINAL FANTASY is …
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We pick up the trail of Lady Iceheart, attempting to stop her from summoning Shiva. The heretics are dug in across Coerthas though, and we struggle to keep up with their schemes. Join us as we continue with the patch 2.4 main scenario in Final Fantasy XIV! You can reach us at: https://discord.gg/SUHTBVMVxj podreturnffxiv@gmail https://www.patreon.c…
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As the main scenario approaches Heavensward, we finally get some serious Ishgard action! Alphinaud is granted an audience with a high ranking official after being ignored countless times. If the cloistered nation is willing to negotiate though, they are sure to ask a heavy price. Join us as we continue on with the Final Fantasy 14 main scenario que…
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We take a break from A Realm Reborn to binge on Dawntrail! This week we chat about our early impressions of the new expansion. Spoilers for the first two zones only! You can reach us at: https://discord.gg/SUHTBVMVxj podreturnffxiv@gmail https://www.patreon.com/Podreturnffxiv FINAL FANTASY is a registered trademark of Square Enix Holdings Co., Ltd.…
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It's been a long time since we've visited the longstop, but our favorite goblin is in a bind and needs our help! Never mind that this is a problem of her own making. Join us as we face down the enigmatic goblin Illuminati. The cheese wants to be free! You can reach us at: https://discord.gg/SUHTBVMVxj podreturnffxiv@gmail https://www.patreon.com/Po…
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We return to Little Solace against our better judgment and become embroiled in sylphic affairs once again. The sylph's Chosen One will soon be born, and they need a parent! We'll have to team up with a Twin Adders-appointed "expert" to resolve this custody dispute. Join us for our final FFXIV A Realm Reborn tribe quest! You can reach us at: https:/…
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We embark on our final Disciple of the Hand job quest in A Realm Reborn! The goldsmith's guildmaster may be charming, but we run into some friction with the guild's resident problematic mammet. Join us as we hone our skills and avoid workplace woes in the FFXIV goldsmith questline through level 50! You can reach us at: https://discord.gg/SUHTBVMVxj…
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We take a break from our life of intrigue to blow off steam with some old fashioned gladiating. The Halatali grounds are back open for business, and we are invited to take them for a spin. Join us for some low-stakes action in our visit to the Halatali hard mode dungeon in FFXIV! You can reach us at: https://discord.gg/SUHTBVMVxj podreturnffxiv@gma…
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We have reached our 100th episode! To celebrate we complete a floor 200 challenge run of Palace of the Dead! We talk about strategies to handle the challenge floors, resource conservation, and the deadliest enemies that we run into in these dangerous levels. We also debrief with the challenge crew. Thank you to everyone who has joined us for these …
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Things get lively in Palace of the Dead as we begin our delve! In part one of our two-part POTD coverage, we talk about general palace strategies, its story and place in our world, and we hit the first 100 floors. Join us as we venture into our first Deep Dungeon in Final Fantasy 14! You can reach us at: https://discord.gg/SUHTBVMVxj podreturnffxiv…
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Edda is getting married and we're invited! In Tam Tara Deepcroft, you say? To her dead fiance Avere? And their dead companion Liavinne will be there? And she wants to kill the other guests and steal their souls? This wedding keeps getting worse and worse! Join us as we attend this dismal union in the hard mode of this classic FFXIV dungeon. You can…
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Our coverage of the patch 2.3 story concludes! Alphinaud's bold new grand company comes together while we head off in pursuit of a heretic leader that is menacing our Ishgardian friends. One thing is certain: when we make it through these tribulations, we will have some.... brave new companions. Join us as we complete this leg of the main scenario …
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Seeing the shortcomings of the Scions of the Seventh Dawn, Alphinaud proposes to embark upon a new initiative: a militarized multinational force for good! This organization will need members, and who better to spearhead recruitment than its poster child: The Warrior of Light! Join us as we wrangle the masses in this continuation of the FFXIV main s…
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The aetherial rumbles in the Twelveswood have turned into a thunderstorm and we can no longer levin this matter alone. Fresh from the Ul'dahn refugee crisis, we flash over to Sylphlands to give their patron primal a talking to. Sparks will fly in our encounter with Ramuh in this continuation of the Final Fantasy XIV main scenario! You can reach us …
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This episode, we resume the Main Scenario Quest with the patch 2.3 story. The unrest plotted by syndicate member Teledji Adeleji has come to bear, with violent uprisings in Ul'dah's streets. Join us as we navigate this political and ethical morass in Final Fantasy XIV's main story! You can reach us at: https://discord.gg/SUHTBVMVxj podreturnffxiv@g…
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The Sahagin and Limsans have long been at each other's throats, with each perceiving the other as an existential threat. One Sahagin sees in this conflict the death of their people - a slow push off their coastal spawning grounds and a looming extinction without the ability to reproduce. He has no love for Limsa, but he will do what he can to safeg…
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It's time to trade our weapons in for frying pans and enter the battlefield of the Bismarck: Limsa Lominsa's #1 restaurant and home to the Culinarian's guild. In this episode we through navigate kitchen drama and cutthroat critics as we rise from an above-average cook to a celebrity chef! You can reach us at: https://discord.gg/SUHTBVMVxj podreturn…
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Our Crystal Tower adventure concludes with a foray into the World of Darkness. For the first time in documented history, mortals will enter the Void! Our chances of survival are slim, but it's the only opportunity we have to rescue the ones seized by the Cloud of Darkness. Join us for this finale to the A Realm Reborn alliance raid series! You can …
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Every day is leg day as our Crystal Tower series continues into Syrcus Tower itself! We welcome an old nemesis and new friends into NOAH, and we gain entrance to the tower proper. Our mission: regicide. Join us for part 3 of our coverage of this A Realm Reborn alliance raid series. You can reach us at: https://discord.gg/SUHTBVMVxj podreturnffxiv@g…
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We resume our Crystal Tower series with us setting foot into the tower itself! Or the basement, anyway. We must overcome the preserved Allagan horrors and voidsent that still lurk in the labyrinth below the tower. Will NOAH overcome these trials? Not that Noah, the other one. Join us as this FFXIV alliance raid series continues! You can reach us at…
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We kick off our Crystal Tower adventures with a look back into the past, recounting the rise and fall of the Allagans and the events that led to the creation and rediscovery of the tower. Join us as we explore this essential part of the Final Fantasy 14 story and start on our first alliance raid series! You can reach us at: https://discord.gg/SUHTB…
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It's time for our Warriors of Light to put down the bow and pick up the bow-harp. We are introduced to a former God's Quiver celebrity who refuses to nock an arrow. They want to teach us about a new power instead - the power of song! Join us as we redefine our beliefs about the fine arts in the FFXIV Bard questline through level 50! You can reach u…
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We follow up on troubling rumors of a disturbance at Haukke Manor. The presumed silent manor is once again a source of horrific screams and frightening visions. We are not ones to leave a job half-done, so we return to the estate to silence its denizens once and for all. Join us for this Final Fantasy 14 side dungeon adventure! You can reach us at:…
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We conclude our coverage of the Patch 2.2 Main Story with a climactic showdown against the primal Leviathan. And! We have a surprise meeting with a fashionable blast from the past. Join us for the finale to this Final Fantasy XIV storyline! You can reach us at: https://discord.gg/SUHTBVMVxj podreturnffxiv@gmail https://www.patreon.com/Podreturnffxi…
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Reeling from our defeat in the battlefield of Ul'dahn politics, we make the best of a bad situation and prepare to escort the Doman refugees to Mor Dhona. Their welcome is cut short though by grave news from La Noscea. Join us as we get to know our new friends and discover the hidden depths of the Echo in this continuation of the FFXIV patch 2.2 ma…
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We start our playthrough of the Patch 2.2 Main Story Quest! Elemental crystals are going missing from Horizon while a mysterious vessel full of refugees arrives in Vesper Bay. We'll encounter new friends and foes as we embark on this next chapter of the A Realm Reborn story. You can reach us at: https://discord.gg/SUHTBVMVxj podreturnffxiv@gmail ht…
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A promise of fortune turns foul when we are tricked by a mourning lover into exploring the Tonberry-ridden Wanderer's Palace. We navigate these Nymian ruins, facing foes and clockwork contraptions only to confront the king of the Tonberries! Join us as we delve into this Final Fantasy 14 dungeon. You can reach us at: https://discord.gg/SUHTBVMVxj p…
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Once again, our Warriors of Light join a crafting guild with productive intentions but we become swept up in the guild's inner problems. Taking on the mantle of champion for the Limsan armorer's guild, we put it all on the line in a winner-take-all craft-off. The stakes? The guildmaster's feelings. Join us for the level 1-50 Armorer job quest in Fi…
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Introducing Vana'diel Vansplainer, the whirlwind tour of Final Fantasy XI! In advance of the Dawntrail release, we are arming ourselves with direct knowledge of this other Final Fantasy MMO. This survey of the 11 experience will take you through the locations and storylines of Vana'Diel while sparing you the quirks of its game design. Episode 1 is …
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We have reached the end of the Final Coil! This finale pits us face to face with Bahamut himself. Join us as we battle for the fate of Eorzea and uncover the deepest secrets of the Calamity in this conclusion to our Coils raid series. You can reach us at: https://discord.gg/SUHTBVMVxj podreturnffxiv@gmail https://www.patreon.com/Podreturnffxiv FINA…
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It is time to enter the Final Coil! We are joined in this venture by new allies, some wanted and some grudgingly accepted. Forces assembled and entrance gained, we plunge into the final depths of these relics and uncover ancient crimes committed by their makers. Join us as we face perils both physical and emotional in our penultimate exploration of…
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We conclude our descent into the Second Coil and come face to face with another presumed dead heavy-hitter from Eorzea's past - Nael Deus Darnus. We delve into the history of this figure before facing them in a final FINAL showdown. Join us as we revisit a pivotal moment in Eorzea's history and decide the fate of the realm all over again, in our co…
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